What time does your teenager go to bed?

wildgarlic · What time does your teenager go to bed?

My 14 year old lives with his dad and he's hardly ever in bed before midnight. I have suggested to both him and his dad that he should be in bed earlier but pretty much get laughed at.

His dad reckons that he can't do much about it and that it's not causing a problem so will just leave things as they are.

Maria

She's in bed for 9.30-10 each week night, without fail. Not that I have to force her, she says she's tired about then. Unlike her mother she's an early bird - so that might explain it! She did go through a spell a couple of years ago of wanting to stay up late - but I was a meani and tried to stick to bedtime routines. At the weekend she goes to sleep whenever she chooses! When she's out and about socialising it's been known to be 4am or not at all!!!! I'm not grumbling, I guess it's a case of work hard, play hard.

Oh for those who don't know she's 15 - although she's advertised that one pretty well.

monkey nuts

I have two 15yr olds. S is 7 months older than A (that made you think didn't it

I didn't give birth to either

) S goes to bed when we do all week but A has a 10 o'clock bedtime school nights. There is a huge difference in their maturity levels and this has not been a problem to date. When A leaves school he can stay up, but not until then.

My own two boys always had a bedtime until they left school too, I believe all kids thrive much better on routine.

IainC

Don't have teenagers yet (thank $deity

) but I think I'd still want them to have some kind of rules... we'll see when our two get to that age though.

A lot, as has been said, depends on their maturity (or not) as much as age. Thing is, these days with tvs, consoles, etc in bedrooms whether they go to bed or not is kinda immaterial. I know when I was young (pre-teen) I would be sent to bed, but I was still reading a book when mum and dad went to bed most nights.

lor138

My son who is 12 next week has a bedtime of 8.30pm wherever possible. His light is usually out at 10pm. He's in bed around the same time even at weekends but he's allowed to watch a dvd in bed on Fri and Sat night.
I've had them in a routine for as long as i can remember and it does them no harm.
Although your case is slightly different WG. It's going to be a lot more difficult for you to enforce as neither father or son are really interested in your routine it seems.

IainC

My kids (being younger) go to bed anytime from about 7.30 onwards. Generally thru' the week we get them off sharp but at the weekend (and friday) we don't tend to bother as much.

TBH, in WG's case I don't think there is a point in pushing it too much, 'cos all that'll happen (after the argument) is the father will tell the son "when you are speaking to you mum... you go to bed at 9pm remember" and they'll carry on as usual (except you'll believe that he's in bed earlier).

lachlanandmarcus

My parents had two rules. One was for when you had to be in your room and doing something quiet (reading, quiet music, drawing or in bed - not computer games or TV they werent allowed in room) which was about 11pm tho most of the time I was up by 10pm.

The other was when all noise and activity had to stop and that was really midnight.

That worked quite well, its a bit like when I couldnt sleep and would go downstairs to bug them and parents would say, thats ok, dont try to sleep, just lie down quietly, its ok not to sleep and then of course I went to sleep!

By insisting on quiet activities in bedroom but not bed itself the teenager often accepts it a bit more and more often than not ends up going to bed......might be a good halfway house?

Julie

I think mine were in bed before ten by that age but Niki used to go at around nine through choice - she's a long sleeper like me.
Glad it's not my problem any more but if it was, I would base my decision on how much sleep he seemed to need. If he is coping fine with a late bedtime and still ok for schoolwork, concentration etc, then why not leave well alone? If you think he is suffering for it, you could always give him a choice between extra study or bed. If that doesn't make him volunteer for an early bedtime, at least he will be getting some good from it.
I used to feel it was better to pick the battles I could win and use cunning for the trickier ones

kimmie

when my son was a teen...school nights would be 9pm lights out by 9.30 and weekend nights (fri and sat) 10pm and lights out by 11pm but then he wasnt allowed computer games in his bedroom...so he would read and be asleep before 11pm

wildgarlic

Thanks for replies... C will often be on msn late at night, after midnight. He's now got a friend in Australia and has told me that on occasion it's been 2am or so before he's finished talking.

Oh well.. he's going to get a shock on Tuesday when he stays here