NEEPS

ridgey · Posted: Thu Jan 17, 2008 8:18 pm Post subject: Blonde Jokes

Blonde Logic:�

Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking.

One blonde says to the other, 'Which do you think is farther away ..
Florida or the moon?'
The other blonde turns and says 'Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida ?'

Speeding Ticket

A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely
if he could see her license.
She replied in a huff, 'I wish you guys would get your act together.�
Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me
to show it to you!'

River Walk:

There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river and
sees another blonde on the opposite bank. 'Yoo-hoo!' she shouts,
'How can I get to the other side?'
The second blonde looks up the river then down the river and shouts back
'You ARE on the other side.'

At the Doctor's

A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's office and says that

her body hurt wherever she touches it.

'Impossible!' says the doctor. 'Show me.'

The redhead takes her finger, pushes on her left shoulder and screams

and then she pushes her elbow and screams even more. She pushes

her knee and screams; likewise she pushes her ankle and screams.

Everywhere she touches makes her scream.

The doctor says, 'You're not really a redhead, are you?

'Well, no' she says, 'I'm actually a blonde.'

'I thought so,' the doctor says. 'Your finger is broken.'

Blonde On The Sun:

A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day.

The Russian said, 'We were the first in space!'

The American said, 'We were the first on the moon!'

The Blonde said, 'So what? We're going to be the first on the sun!'

The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads.

'You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!' said the Russian.

To which the Blonde replied, 'We're not stupid, you know. We're going at night!'

In A Vacuum:

A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn.

She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature. Her question was,

'If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?'

She thought for a time and then asked, 'Is it on or off?'

Finally,�

A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs,

and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by saying

that one was named Rolex and the other was named Timex.

Her friend said, 'Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?'

'Helllooooooooooooooo', answered the blonde, 'They're watch dogs !'
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dizzyblond · Neepster Joined: 04 Sep 2007 Posts: 364 Location: Nairn

lol i do blond soooooo weeelllllll!!!!!!!!

adn its out of a bottle so even better!!!!!
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pete_inthehills · Posted: Fri Jan 18, 2008 12:04 am Post subject:

hmm..is this thread blondist?

anyway, what's the difference between a blonde and a shopping trolley?

A shopping trolley has a mind of its own!
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MarkA · Neepster Joined: 04 Jul 2007 Posts: 223 Location: Mintlaw

Ooh great, blonde jokes!

Does this mean we can take the piss out of The Irish & blacks now?

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dizzyblond · Neepster Joined: 04 Sep 2007 Posts: 364 Location: Nairn

that's wicked - lol !!!!!!!
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Smooth Hound · Posted: Sun Jan 20, 2008 5:21 pm Post subject:

Sassinak · Posted: Sun Jan 20, 2008 6:59 pm Post subject:

Or how about a black, lesbian, Irish Jew !!
Trouble is I don't know any jokes about them lol
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